Right, so the first thing I’ve learnt on my ‘try new things’ mission is that the reason I felt kind of, well, bored as a stay-at-home mum last time is that it really is quite restrictive. I’m trying to identify new things to try, but it’s hard when you’ve really only got 20 minutes a day (if you’re lucky) when both kids are asleep, or you’ve only got one hand free while you’re breastfeeding, or you’re running after your toddler who has just wandered away from the potty with pee pee dripping down her leg. We’re also somewhat restricted in the money department with only one of us earning, so there’ll be no activities involving major purchases or fees.
So I’ve ummed and ahhed a bit this week while I searched for my latest new thing to try. Then an old friend rang up and said she’d like to visit. She is a yoga practitioner who has just returned from doing a month-long Thai massage course in Thailand. Aha! I thought. This is my opportunity! She’s bound to be able to teach me something new.
About an hour into the visit I pounced. ‘So I’ve started this mission…’ I explained, and asked if she’d mind teaching me something about Thai massage. But she struggled to find a discrete (not to be confused with discreet – I’m not making a crass joke about Thai massage here) technique or stroke, as apparently Thai massage is kind of all or nothing - it’s the whole package, the whole body, for a whole hour, if not two. So we started talking about why I was on this mission instead.
We talked about the way I felt last time I was at home with baby number one, and she prodded me for what I meant by ‘bored’. We eventually narrowed it down to a feeling of being unfulfilled – after a professional life of structured feedback, ticked-off ‘to do’ lists and planned and executed accomplishments, it was difficult to adjust to a life of living in the present and going with the flow. She had read a book that proposed that motherhood was the spiritual journey to end all spiritual journeys – that it really requires you to face yourself and your demons. It’s certainly true that I had become very used to a life of external motivation and rewards, and perhaps motherhood was (and is) an opportunity for me to become more introspective and, just as a baby does, live life in the present and enjoy just being. Huh.
Just before she left I asked if she practises meditation, which is something I’ve been thinking of trying. She said she does sometimes, and brought up the concept of ‘yoga nidra’, or yoga sleep. This is a state achievable by guided meditation, and she tells me that the benefit of 15 minutes of yoga nidra is the equivalent of two hours’ sleep. It sounds rather delicious: “a state of conscious deep sleep for extreme relaxation and subtler spiritual exploration.”; “Yoga Nidra is a systematic method of complete relaxation, holistically addressing our physiological, neurological, and subconscious needs.” Or, in simple terms, it calms, relaxes and refreshes you, and it’s FREE. I gotta get me some of that.
Weirdly enough, I realised afterwards that even as I talked about this stuff I was breathing more slowly and deeply. Apparently it’s calming to contemplate calmness.
So I searched for a guided meditation on You Tube. Turns out that in 2009, a lovely lady called Aurora, ‘Queen of Transformation’, uploaded a Christmas gift for anyone who’s interested – a guided meditation in 3 clips. All you need is a floor, your computer, 25 minutes and an open mind. Yoga nidra, here we come.
Aside from the annoyingly persistent fly who seemed determined to prevent me from reaching yoga nidra, and the break in concentration required to keep the meditation going when each clip ended, I can report that it was a thoroughly successful and blissful experience. And funnily enough this is not a new thing for me – I used to attend yoga classes when I was in my late teens/ early 20s, and it seems we used to practise yoga nidra at the end of every class. I just thought it was a bit of nice ‘lie down while the teacher talks to you quite slowly’ time.
The Queen of Transformation acknowledges at the end of the meditation that it’s not the most relaxing way to reach yoga nidra if you have to keep selecting a new clip, so she very helpfully offers her email address (lanidra@gmail.com) – on request she will email you a full clip. Now all I need to worry about is my laptop battery running out halfway through.
I will most definitely keep up this practice, and I can thoroughly recommend it to anyone who would like a way to quickly relax and re-energise. I find myself feeling clear-minded and fresh, ready to deal with the demands of the family life. And did I mention it’s free? Awesome.
Other new stuff I tried this week:
- Laingholm Beach fish and chips – averagely yum but nice setting and worth the trip. Also has a nice playground across the road and a dairy for an ice cream.
- Arriving at a pot-luck dinner with nothing to contribute – easy and cheap! But not really recommended, especially if you’re coming to my house for a pot-luck dinner.
- Te Atatu Peninsula library – perfectly nice run-of-the mill library with a couple of toys for the toddler, who (weirdly enough) pulled a random book off the shelf which turned out to be a book about coping with a new baby in the house. Handy.
I’m keen on receiving help with this mission, by the way. Do you have a hobby or skill you could share with me?
And what new stuff have you been up to this week?
